Artist’s Way week 1 review

innerkidstuffCollage

(My inner kid also loves making collages like this on Picmonkey.com!  If only she’d had a computer.) So….at the end of each week in The Artist’s Way, you’re supposed to sit down and review how it went.  If you’re working through this book or have done it in the past, I’d love to hear from you! Here’s my review for the first week.

I finished my morning pages every day and was shocked at how easy it was to get up a half hour earlier to get it done. I’d set my coffee pot to have (decaf) coffee ready for me when I got up and I’d just spew words onto the page for a half hour. I’ve never thought of myself as a morning person so this was pretty amazing. Hopefully I can keep it up.

The most significant thing this week was that the exercises really seemed to open the gate for my inner kid to come out and play. For my Artist Date I went to the dollar store and spent $5 on things that she wanted:  poster board, glitter glue, stickers, bubble bath. I spent probably an hour in the store wandering around trying to remember myself around age 8 or 9. It was really fun.

I realized that a major block to becoming an artist (which was my dream all through childhood) is that I’ve spent so much time being an uber-responsible adult that I’ve lost that little kid confidence that doesn’t worry about how others might judge you, but just wants to play and be spontaneous and have fun. Like Will Ferrell in Elf. My little kid self, that part of me that existed before I started internalizing all the “You’ll never making a living at art” and “You don’t need a career because you’re going to be a wife and mother” crap has no problem calling herself an Artist. She dresses up like what she imagines artists look like every day. She doesn’t care if people think she’s crazy. She doesn’t even know what crazy means. She just wants to draw and paint and put glitter on stuff and have fun and what if we put this and that together…..ooooh, cool! Now I wanna go fill up empty peanut butter jars with pretty leaves and river rocks and see if there are still roly poly bugs under that big fallen tree trunk….

Even when I was a kid and a teenager, I spent so much time mothering and tending children and listening to grown ups tell me their problems like I was their personal little therapist, and being an Example To Others, because I was the oldest and that was my job and I had to take it very seriously because when I didn’t I got punished.

To hell with that.  And chill out, Inner Uber-Adult, I’ll still pay my bills, get my car fixed, and make sure my kid isn’t getting into trouble. I will just do it as an Artist leaving a trail of glitter glue, paint, yarn fuzzies, pretty rocks, and echoing laughter.

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